I Want CandyDEAD
by TayterBug
Summary: Sequel to "Emmett's Reaction to Kelly" continues where it left off...oneshot...REVIEW!


AN Thank You to all of my reviewers

**AN Thank You to all of my reviewers! Here is Emmett's reaction to "I Want Candy…Dead" Hope you like it :)**

_Hmm…"I Want Candy...Dead"? I wonder what that's about. Let's see._

"Ahahahahaaa!!" I yell once the song has finished. "I've Gotta tell Bella. BELLA!?"

"Yea Emmett?" She asked breathless. Obviously from running up the stairs.

"Have you seen this video?" I asked pointing to the screen.

"What's it called?" She came over and sat down.

"'I Want Candy…Dead'"

"No. Play it." I clicked play.

"Ahahaa!" Oh my Jonas Emmett. That's hilarious! I think I know what our next performance is." She smiled a wicked smile. I went to and printed us both a copy of the lyrics.

-2 hours later-

"Okay. So, we have the game plan?" Bella asked.

"Yep! Now all we need are outfits and Jasper to agree."

"Alice? Jasper?"

"Yes! Come on. This will be fun." She took me off while Bella talked to Jasper.

She put me in blue jeans that sagged a little. With a red button up. At some point Bella and Jasper came in. Alice had dressed him like me but with a black button up shirt. We each had a pair of black high top converse on.

Alice found the karaoke version of Aaron Carters "I Want Candy" and put it on a CD. We went downstairs (were the stage was still set-up from the past performance) Bella called everyone down again. Jasper and I were backstage.

"I have no idea how Bella got me to do this."

"Oh be quiet and have fun!"

Bella got on stage.

"Tonight we have Jasper and Emmett here for a little performance."

She got offstage and the lights dimmed. Alice started the music.

We walked on the stage each with a cell phone presses to our ears.

the words in the parentheses are Emmett

Em -Will somebody answer the fucking phone? Good Lord.  
Hello?  
Jaz - Hey Justin.  
Em - My name isn't Justin.  
Jaz - Hey. It's Aaron.  
Em - That's great.  
Jaz - I can't come out tonight.  
Em - What?  
Jaz - I'm going to see this girl.  
Em - But I thought we were gonna have an orgy.  
Jaz - No. No. Her name is Candy.  
Em - I don't care what her name is.  
Jaz - She's real cute. I gotta go. See ya.  
Em - What? Oh, hell no.  
Jaz - I know a girl who's tough but sweet.

(More like sour.)  
She's so fine she can't be beat.  
(I'll fucking beat her.)  
She's got everything that I  
desire. (Yeah, well she's missing  
a few inches.)  
Set the summer sun on fire. (I'll light her on fire.)  
I want Candy. (Ew.)  
I want Candy. (I didn't know you liked the taco.)  
I want Candy. (Are you sure it's not Randy?)  
I want Candy. (I'll kill that bitch.)  
Go to see her when the sun goes  
down. (You always told me you were  
going to the bathroom.)  
Ain't no finer girl in town. ('Cause she's a slut.)  
You're my girl, what the doctor  
ordered. (I didn't know you could  
have a skank as a prescription.)  
So sweet she makes my mouth water.  
('Cause my cock was in your mouth  
last night.)  
I want Candy. (Yeah, candy penis.)  
I want Candy. (You're gonna smell like fish.)  
I want Candy. (Bitch, you're not Willy Wonka.)  
I want Candy. (She's just a loose-pussied ho.)  
Hey. (What?)  
Hey. (What?!)  
Hey. (Why do you keep saying hey?)  
Hey. (Stop it.)  
Hey. (What is this hey?)  
Hey. (Stop it.)  
Hey. (I will kill you. Shut up.)  
Hey.  
Candy on the beach, there's nothing  
better. (Oh, gag me with a spoon.)  
But I like Candy when it's wrapped  
in a sweater. (Well, isn't that  
kinky.)  
Someday soon I'll make you mine. (You're a  
cockeye, I don't want you.)  
Then I'll have Candy all the time.  
(You'll have the smell of fish all  
the time.)  
I want Candy. (It's not even Halloween.)  
I want Candy. (She's not even a real girl.)  
I want Candy. (Great. Let's go to  
WalMart and get some.)  
I want Candy. (Oh, God, we get the point.)  
Candy in the morning time. (Ew.)  
Candy in the hot sunshine. (Ew.)  
Candy, baby, can't you see? (No.)  
All I want is your Candy! (Gross.)  
Candy in the morning time. (Ew.)  
Candy in the hot sunshine. (Ew.)  
Candy, baby, can't you see? (No.)  
All I want is your Candy!  
Hey. (Oh, not again.)  
Hey. (Shut up.)  
Hey.  
All I want is your Candy!  
Hey. (Shut up.)  
Hey. (I will kill you...I will kill you with my eyeliner)  
Hey.  
Hey. All I want is your Candy!  
(I'll kill that bitch, too!)

We bowed and ran off stage. Bella came out with her camera and took a picture with us. Jasper and I ran vampire speed upstairs. We got changed and went downstairs. Bella and Alice were already downloading the video to youtube. They also had an email tab up.

"What are you doing?" I asked suspiciously.

"Well, first, we are going to upload the video to youtube. Then, were gonna email it to Geoffrey Paris and some magazines." Alice said.

"Great! Now, Jasper and I will be all over the world wide web. Wow!" I said sarcastically.

"Well, I already sent the one with you and Bella to Kelly and the same magazines I'm sending this one to. Kelly even replied to it."

I looked at Bella and she was blushing. Alice just started laughing. I went back upstairs. Youtube was still up from when I was on it last. I clicked on Kelly's page.

"_Wow! She's on tour? I want tickets!"_ I clicked the link to buy tickets. I bought two for Seattle, WA. _"Yay! Now me and Bella can go."_ I saw another link for meet and greet passes and bought two of them too. I went back to youtube and looked at the most viewed video. _"Charlie the Unicorn? Wonder if Bella has seen that?" _

"BELLA?!"

**AN: review? Charlie the Unicorn will be next. Give me some inspiration!**


End file.
